Happy Valentine's Day kiddies. For those of you who think a bouquet of carnations and a card will seal the deal tonight - here are a few better options.
For tonight only, Le Parker Meridien is allowing room service from the Burger Joint to their Presidential Suite...which is also the only suite that comes equipped with it's own screening room...which will also be stocked with porn. Nice. Nothing says "I love you" quite like burgers and porno.
If you want a classier option, I highly recommend swinging by the Ritz Carlton in Moscow tonight. For $275,000 you can drink a bottle of 1907 Heidsieck, the newly-recovered sparkling wine that was shipwrecked over a century ago while being delivered to the Russian Imperial family. Umm...yes please. The last minute logistics are a real nightmare but if you can spend this much on champagne, simple travel details just aren't an issue.
Where the Magic Happens.
For all of my single friends - indulge. Order in some shitty take-out, chain smoke, have a cocktail, get over the fear that you are going to be alone until the end of time, and get your ass to Club Rush. Lorenzo Martone (Mrs. Marc Jacobs) and Butt Magazine (the vintage gay porn mag) are hosting Butt Valentine - a fun, singles-only dance party. Get some.
My Valentine. J'adore.